Table Of ContentFrom MTV to Mecca
In the name of God,
the most merciful,
the most compassionate.
KRISTIANE BACKER
From MTV to Mecca
HOW ISLAM INSPIRED MY LIFE
Contents
Title Page
Foreword by Tariq Ramadan
1. Journey to the East
2. How I Got the Job at MTV
3. Life as an MTV VJ
4. Higher Love
5. Adventure, Discovery and Realisation
6. Over
7. Becoming a Muslim
8. Learning for Life
9. Awakening
10. My Spiritual Path
11. Pledge of Allegiance
12. A New Beginning
13. Islam of the Heart
14. Journey to the Heart: The Hajj
15. Marriage
16. Coming Out as a European Muslim
17. The Journey Continues
Key Tenets of Islam
Glossary
Acknowledgements
Plates
About the Author
Copyright
Foreword by Tariq Ramadan
This book recalls the journey of a woman, Kristiane Backer, who encountered Islam when she was a
presenter with MTV. Hers was a world that had no association with religion, was disconnected from
Christianity and Islam, far from any kind of spirituality. A world of entertainment, music and pop
videos, acting as distraction in our lives, sometimes making us forget the true meaning of life. Whilst
Kristiane was working at MTV she began a personal quest, which she describes in her book: how
during her travels across the globe, she came across different people who believed in God, and it is
through these conversations and experiences that her own spiritual journey towards God gradually
began to unfold.
Throughout the book three important dimensions become apparent in the development of
Kristiane’s personal relationship with God. The first is when she moves her focus away from the
entertainment industry, where it is easy to forget about one’s self, and instead she begins to consider
the true meaning of what it is to be a human being. Kristiane knew of physical and emotional love,
however, when she discovered the very essence of spirituality, she found a higher love, something
beyond human love – the love of the Creator. Consequently she recognises the second dimension, the
quest for and the real essence of life – not only what it means to be a human being, but how each of us
must deal with our own life, heart and mind. Kristiane began this journey asking questions, and along
the way found new answers about how she might live a more fulfilled, contented and giving life. And
finally the third dimension, whereby in returning to God, to the meaning, content and substance of life,
and acknowledging the ethical teachings of our faith, one can experience a whole new beginning, start
life again, with new love, new responsibility and new objectives.
All of these elements are drawn sensitively step-by-step through Kristiane’s experiences – a very
personal account of a conversion, a transformation of the heart, of the meaning of life and of the self.
Kristiane’s story is rather like the Muslim pilgrimage to Mecca – the very meaning of which is at
first an initiation, where one returns from the periphery to the centre, to God. Kristiane begins to
understand that God is the Light in our lives, the essence of love. This love and its light radiate over
all other aspects of our lives – marital, social, indeed everything relating to the human being, be it
people of the same faith or of other backgrounds and religions. This new beginning is a return to the
source and to the heart, and this, the very essence of Islamic spirituality, is reflected in Kristiane’s
transformation without her judging or describing what she consciously chose to leave as something
which itself is bad, but simply acknowledging that it is about choosing to have a different
understanding, of living a new life in closer proximity to God.
On her way, Kristiane encountered limits – in behaviour (prohibitions, commands and
recommendations) and rituals (praying, fasting etc). From the outside these concepts could be
perceived as rules and restrictions that inhibit freedom. Yet as Kristiane takes us through her
awakening, we begin to understand that these limits and the discipline that she found in her
commitment towards Islam were in fact a way for her to achieve another kind of freedom – not
freedom of entertainment but freedom of being. By being free as a human being one has an
understanding of the dignity needed in other areas of life such as friendship, marriage, sister- and
brotherhood and in serving other people. Kristiane explains that this sense helped her to achieve inner
stability and gain a better understanding of who she really is and would like to be. This was reached
through developing her relationship with God, her love towards God, and understanding that with
such love comes compassion – the very essence of living with other human beings.
Kristiane’s memoir is interesting, indeed poignant. One often hears disturbing stories about Islam
and Muslim women being discriminated against and oppressed; yet here is the journey of a woman
who shows how converting to Islam gave her a sense of liberation. Liberation from appearances and
superficiality towards the true and deep freedom that can be achieved through one’s faith – without
rejecting entertainment per se but giving entertainment life and love, as well as serving and
participitating as a human being among other human beings – the essence of life and recognising that
by serving people one serves God. Through this process of liberation one understands that true
freedom is not being able to do whatever you want to do, but asking yourself what you really want
and whether you really want what you think you want, if you really are where you want to be?
Kristiane tells the reader that her encounter with Islam changed her life as a human being, as a
woman. She had always believed that she was free, yet in fact she realised that this was not the case,
so she began her quest towards true freedom and a spiritual life. This is the deepest message of the
spiritual dimension of Islam and Kristiane has thoughtfully translated this message through her own
story.
From MTV to Mecca is an enlightening book for the Western reader, providing one individual’s
perspective of Islam. Its focus is not to highlight the problems that exist within our Western societies,
rather it suggests that for Muslims, both converts or by birth, Islam can be a solution not a problem –
it is freedom, not discrimination; it is participation, not isolation; it is to give not only to take and yes,
it is about duties as much as rights. These concepts exist throughout all spiritual and religious
traditions and this is where Islam can be understood from within the heart. Kristiane Backer – a
Westerner, a journalist, a woman – converted to Islam and in writing about it she is able to bring the
very essence of the Islamic message to the centre of Western societies. This book is not only a bridge,
it is reconciliation.
Chapter 1
Journey to the East
River Deep Mountain High …
Tina Turner
The stadium was full to bursting point. Miles of stretch limousines clogged the roads leading to the
building on Westwood Plaza. Everybody who was anybody on the international music scene had
turned up for what was one of the most important events of the year. And there I was, with a small
group of colleagues from MTV in London and our Chief Executive, Brent Hansen. I found myself part
of a massive audience surrounded by all the music industry greats: record company bosses, PR
people, agents and anyone who was considered important enough to be invited to the 1992 MTV
Video Music Awards in Los Angeles, known as the ‘Oscars for youth’.
There was an incredible buzz, and it was my job to present Annie Lennox backstage with the MTV
prize, a statue of an astronaut on the moon, for Best Female Video. It was just a photo opportunity, but
as one doesn’t have one’s photo taken every day with ‘the greatest white soul singer alive’, I was
looking forward to meeting her. The velvet-voiced Scottish singer was one of the few women at this
event who was a natural beauty. In contrast, most of the LA starlets were flaunting their trout pouts,
barely-there miniskirts and pneumatic chests. A film director’s comment later, at the Vanity Fair
after-show party, confirmed my impression: ‘Natural just isn’t an option in Hollywood. Not if you
want to get anywhere, that is …’ The guys for the most part wore jeans and T-shirts or tight leather
pants, and many kept their shades on inside the venue and later at night – perhaps to look cool or to
cover their doped-up eyes.
Despite the weird and wonderful backdrop, I enjoyed the show, hosted for the first time by witty
comedian Dana Carvey, the star of Wayne’s World and Saturday Night Live. Guns N’ Roses, Red
Hot Chilli Peppers, Def Leppard, Pearl Jam, The Black Crowes and Eric Clapton all performed at
the awards to honour the best music videos. In true rock ’n’ roll fashion Bobby Brown dropped an ‘f’
bomb after performing his hit single ‘Humpin’ around’, but the censors apparently didn’t catch the
slip. MTV had requested that Nirvana perform their smash hit ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’, while the
band itself was keen to play their new songs ‘Rape Me’ and ‘Tourette’s’. Network executives had
continued to push for ‘Teen Spirit’, but finally agreed to let the band play ‘Lithium’, a compromise
that Nirvana appeared to accept. But when they went on stage, Kurt Cobain sang the first few lines of
‘Rape Me’, much to the horror of MTV bigwigs, before continuing with ‘Lithium’. Near the end of the
song, frustrated that his amp had stopped functioning, bassist Krist Novoselic decided to toss his
instrument into the air for dramatic effect. He misjudged the move, and the bass ended up bouncing off
his forehead – at least it was his own and no one else’s – forcing him to stumble off the stage in a
daze.
This one-week trip to ‘La-La Land’, as my English colleagues dubbed Los Angeles, was a thank-
you gift from Brent Hansen to celebrate the success of my show, the Coca Cola Report. Brent had
always been unconventional – it was one of his strengths and an essential part of his remarkable
success. He was from New Zealand, an easy-going hippie type at heart with long curly hair – a
music-lover rather than a corporate businessman. He loved Prince but was just as much a fan of
country and western, which everyone teased him about.
I sat next to him during the ceremony and thought about how I’d soon be meeting Annie Lennox. But
something was different that evening. It was as though the excitement was washing over me and I
wasn’t really there. In a way I wasn’t. In my mind I was in a faraway land. Before flying to LA, I’d
travelled to Pakistan and trekked through snow-capped mountains, slept beneath the stars and spent
time with simple people who made a greater impression on me with their warmth, their hospitality
and above all their faith in God than most of those I’d met in the entertainment business. Since
returning from Pakistan, my mind had been filled with pictures and memories, and they refused to gel
with the garish, over-the-top world I’d been thrown into in LA. If anything, they made the huge
display of rock-chick glamour seem strangely unreal and superficial.
The show lasted almost five hours and although it was wonderful to see so many great bands, it
was a long evening. There were endless breaks for commercials after every few songs, when nothing
happened and we couldn’t go anywhere either. The whole event began to drag on a bit. Backstage we
heard that Kurt Cobain was having a fight with Axl Rose and, moments before Guns N’ Roses went
on stage, Kurt spat on the piano. He must have been a bit embarrassed when instead of Axl, Elton
John sat down at the piano to accompany the band in ‘November Rain’.
Later, some of the MTV Europe team and I hit the after-show party scene. It was a balmy evening,
the champagne was flowing and the inevitable joints were passed around. There were so many
parties to choose from. The Rolling Stone and Vanity Fair magazines and all the big record
companies held their own. When we didn’t have the right VIP passes, we blagged our way in,
essentially gatecrashing. Most people I met were either in the music or film industry. No one had a
so-called nine-to-five job. We chatted and danced all night and drank more and more champagne.
The next morning, I woke up in my room at the luxurious Mondrian Hotel on Sunset Boulevard with
a hangover. As I lay there in the huge, soft bed waiting for my room service breakfast, images from
Pakistan came flooding back to my mind.
‘Welcome to Islamabad!’
For the first time in my life, I was visiting a country where the population was almost entirely
Muslim and there were very few tourists. As we boarded the plane, I’d noticed that my old school
friend Briggite and I were the only white passengers. The cabin loudspeakers played a prayer in
Arabic or Urdu and, although I couldn’t understand what was being said, I gathered it was a prayer
for a safe journey. We were embarking on a real adventure: we would be hiking in the Himalayas and
exploring the ancient Mogul city of Lahore.
Eight hours later, the Pakistan International Airlines steward had barely opened the heavy
passenger door before the heat of the Pakistani capital hit us. We stepped out at Islamabad airport,
breathing in the scents of a foreign land. Everywhere we turned there were men in shalwar kameez,
the national dress of tunic and loose trousers, and I felt my excitement grow at the prospect of getting
to know both the country and its people. It didn’t occur to me that diving into a world so different
from the exciting life I was leading in August 1992 would have momentous consequences.
As the first German presenter on the music channel MTV Europe, I had spent the last three years in
the limelight. I had become one of the faces of MTV for a generation of kids for whom the channel
was more than just entertainment. MTV made them feel as though they were part of a happening
international scene that advocated fun, music, creative expression and an irreverent attitude as a way
